RIOT!
by TotallyStoned3
Summary: "You know what you're problem is. Puberty. Puberty and bad influences." That maybe true but I would like to say that if he just kept it in his pants then we all wouldn't be in this predicament. AU, Drugs, Gangs, Angst, Romance, HitsuKarin
1. Graffiti 1: The Two That Are Three

_**SHRIOUchan99: I'm back!! And for good this time. While I was away, iIwas thinking of all of you. You guys motivated me to write yet again and so, tomorrow, When You Weren't There will updated and the rest of my fanfics. Day after day, a new chapter will be posted everyday from now on, so look forward to it! **_

**_P.S. I missed you guys!! :D Enjoy my new fanfic._**

Disclaimer: I don't own bleach

* * *

_**Graffiti 1: The Two That Are Three**_

I hate him.

Those are the words that are spoken throughout my day. Day and night. Juice or milk. Wine or weed. Bed or floor. I wake up, my hair tangled in knots, my eyes still filled with sleep, and my mouth…..yeah. But that's not the point. I wake up and jam my feet into a pair of black slippers. I stare at myself in the mirror. Short shorts with a half shirt. Typical sleepwear for me. Then I yawn. People tell me I yawn just like him and that's how it came about.

**I hate him.**

I hate _Toushirou Hitsugaya_. Child p-boy gen-boy genius just like Jimmy Neutron except…with a smaller head, freaking white hair, green eyes, and…….except **WORSE**!!

The best part: he hates me. Now were equal. I, Karin Kurosaki, juvenile delinquent, spiky black hair, and black eyes, and his worse nightmare. I'll teach him a lesson. A lesson for picking me as his rival.

He gets what he gets for fucking with the leader of K3 and I'll watch the leader of T2 crash and born. I'll cause disorder, chaos, and everything in between. I'll watch him suffer. I'll sit back, relax, and enjoy the show. I'll laugh till I piss my pants. All I have to do: is plan. And I got the perfect plan to destroy him inside out. So, I'll explain and you read how it happen and succeed. Plus……….

**I HATE HIM!!**

* * *

I jerk up at the sound of my alarm clock. I could feel the knots tightening in my hair. My eyes could barley stay open. Taking my fist, I smashed my alarm clock to pieces. I threw my covers off and walked but, not before stretching and scratching my back. Anyway, I stood in front of my mirror. My mouth had a trail of dried drool and my eyes were squinted. Then…it came.

The awful, dreadful…………….yawn!

After that, my eyes open completely and my body straightened, I balled my fist and punched the wall, leaving a slight crack.

"I hate him." That was it. My day officially started. I turned the radio on and jammed up the stereo. Sweet, they were playing my favorite song at the right time. That's What You Get. Opening my window, I turned the radio up more for the whole neighborhood to hear.

"No sir, I don't want to be the blame, not anymore. It's your turn. To take a seat. We're settling, the fi-na-l score. And why do we like to hurt so much! I can't decide!" I sung the lyrics as the music blast in the room. Grabbing my towel, I kick my bathroom door open and turned the hot water on blast. I froze and narrowed my eyes.

I hate him.

I heard he likes to shower in cold water. What a loser. Hot water is the shit!! Who would want to freeze their asses off bathing in cold water. And in the morning time! Dumbass.

I heard a bang on my door. A couple of bangs actually. I heard screams of protest out the window. I smirked and gladly open my door to apologize. NOT! I jump right into the shower, whistling the rest of the song while washing my self off.

A few minutes later, I wrap the tower around my form and stare at myself in the mirror. For someone who's fourteen, I have a lot of chest. Yep, that's right, I said it. I also have a few curves but, it doesn't bother me since I hide it with baggy clothing. My arms were covered with fake tattoos and scars from fights or me cutting myself on purpose. My hair, now wet, clung to my shoulder and my face. Clicking my teeth, I walk out the bathroom. The banging remained and this time, I gladly opened the door.

I stood face to face with my brother, sister, and brother's friend. Each of them looked equally pissed . My brother, Ichigo Kurosaki, looked like he hadn't slept for days. His usually spiky orange hair, was straight. His brown eyes, narrowed and his ears were red. Rukia, though not my actual sister( Yuzu went with dad to visit some old friends. They won't be back for a while), looked just like Ichigo. Except her smooth black hair stood up like one of those toys that have multi-color hair. Renji on the other hand, was half asleep-half awake. His loud and bright red hair was both straight and spiked. Crazy hair.

"Yo, Berry-nii." I laughed as I saw his ears turn more red. I love how his ears show his moods.

"Why-are-you-playing-music at 7 in the fucking morning!" Ichigo spoke, slowly and angrily. Though I knew he was trying to be angry, I wasn't the least bit scared.

"Cause…..I like music. Bye-bye!!' I shut the door on their faces and continued to dress myself. I checked myself in the mirror once more. Baggy brown cargo pants and a dark purple shirt that read in bright orange, 'RIOT!'. Slipping on my combat boots, I started to headbang. Though I wasn't a fan of heavy metal, you have to admit, Slipknot could really work some music. Time to slip on some magic.

I grabbed the perfume bottle and sprayed it on my neck twice. What was the point of spraying it everywhere if you already smelt like 'Midnight Flames'. Adding my bracelets and dog-chain collar. I grabbed my leather jacket and shouldered my backpack. Just one more thing before I leave. Two actually.

My lighter and box of Marlboro.

Yeah, I'm a 14 year old that smokes. If you don't like it, fuck it. Deal with it. Turning the radio up some more, I jump out my window and landed in the rose bushes. Grabbing a rose, I walk onto the sidewalk and lit a cigarette. Life was good as a juvenile delinquent.

* * *

The walk was hell. I take that back, it wasn't that bad. I eyed everyone who dared walk on my side. Low lives. I stepped on pretty and gorgeous flowers. Cuteness sucks. I hid from police who drove down the road. Wasn't going to get a lecture on how I'm underage for smoking. I checked my cell phone for the time. 8:13 a.m. I'm well over late. School started thirteen minutes ago but, do I care? ….Yes, I do. **NOT!! **I could give a rats ass if I'm late or not. Besides I have to sit in the fucking front row when I get to class. I stopped and frowned.

I hate him.

I hate the teachers for making me sit next to iceberg. A motorcycle stopped at the red light. Damn it was hot. A sleek black with flames. My type of ride.

"Hey! Dude on the motorcycle!" He turned his attention toward me and I walked up to him. "Would you mind giving me a ride to Karakura Middle?" He nodded his head no. I jumped onto the back and rode with, I called him Ren, all the way to the hellhole I call school.

He dropped me off in front of the gate and I waved bye. I hope I get to meet Ren again. Putting out my cigarette, I walked into the building, surveying every room and office I came by. Trudging up the steps, I enter the second floor. I looked for my classroom and stopped in front of Rm. 2-B.

I hate him.

How come MY classroom has to be on the second floor and not the third floor. I placed my ear on the door to hear my sensei ask a question. Smirking, I opened the door loudly and walked in.

"I know the answer! It's I'm here and ready to learn." I heard snickers amongst the class. Everyone was wearing their uniforms, again. What's the point anyways? The sensei twitched his eyebrows and checked me on his roll.

"Well, Ms. Kurosaki. I have a question for you." I looked at him and smiled. Messing with teachers was my specialty.

"Why are you late?"

"What a fine question. So, answer this. Why are you always early?"

"It's my job."

"Well coming here is not mines." I saw his eyes narrowed. I smirked.

"Why aren't you wearing your uniform?"

"Why are you always wearing a tacky bow tie?"

"How would you like detention?" Walking past him, I sat in my seat and prompt my feet on top of the desk.

"Gladly." He fumed and turned back to the blackboard.

"Sit right."

"Lose your virginity." He turned around and walked up to me. I smirked and stood on my desk, appearing taller than what the short man really was.

"A full week of detention." He turned his back to me and playing with a pencil I looked at the seat next to me. I widen my eyes to the point where I felt they were saucers.

He wasn't here.

I repeated again to make sure I was not dreaming.

He _**wasn't**_ here. Toushirou Hitsugaya was absent.

"Wooooooooooooohooooooooooooo!" Yes, victory was mine. The iceberg wasn't here and I…….I feel so happy that I could cry. I looked around as I noticed that a. Everyone was staring at me. B. I was on top of my desk with my arms in the air. I quickly sat back down and whistled. Can we say……..

Awkward.

Then, the door slid open. My dreams of victory were crushed and spit on as he stood in the doorway. His spiky white hair stood out, his sea-green eyes were concentrated, his school uniform was worn properly.

"Sorry for my tardiness, sensei." The teacher nodded and Toushirou sat in his appropriate seat. He stared at me and smirked. Something in me counted down to three.

1...2.…..3!

" NOOOOOOOOO!!" I banged my head on the desk and knocked my self out. Pain surged through my forehead and I passed out, right then and then. Bloody hell. Why?! Why did he have to show up today!! Why must he make me hurt myself? Why is his hair white? I only know the answer.

I hate him.

* * *

I slowly but surely opened my eyes to see white. NO! I jerked up, not caring for the pain, hoping that what I saw…wasn't _**him**_. I stood up and blinked twice.

One…two.

A breath of fresh air was released inside me as I noticed that the whiteness I saw…was the infirmary walls and curtains. Then, I snickered and rip down the curtains. White is too bright and plain. Why can't it be black? Then, I frowned and threw the curtains down.

I hate him.

Why must everything be white and not black. Walls, white. Floor, white. Even that creepy but yet, cool teddy bear was white. God, it makes me want to rip my hair out.

"Ms. Kurosaki. I see you are up." I glared at the school nurse and shook my head. Sitting back down, I laid my head back on my pillow, to stop the pain surging through my head. The nurse put her rough , grubby hands on my forehead. She replaced my bandages and exit the room.

"Oh, before I leave, you have a visitor. I'll send him right in." With that said, she left out the room. Damn! I hope it's not Ichigo. I had enough of his complaints when I come here. Then, the door opened and closed loudly. Damn, it's Ichigo. Covering myself with the covers, I counted to three before breathing slowly.

The covers were pulled from my head and a surprisingly soft hand grabbed my face and turned it towards his. I know this hand. It touches me everyday and it belongs to the person I hate the most.

_**Toushirou Hitsugaya**_.

"Hey, baby." He said, smoothly and cool like. BABY!! Since when did we start going out. And who gave him the right to call me baby. I growled a tiger-like growl and swatted his hand from my face. Sitting up, I could see his uniform was unbuttoned, showing his well tone chest. Which, I have to admit, was hot. ……………………….I still hate him though. I could also see that the punk was smoking.

Snorting, I got up from bed and brushed myself off. Facing him, my blood boiled. The idiot was smirking and staring at me. I had enough!! It was time to take him down.

Taking the cigarette from his mouth, I flicked it out the window. Then, I pounced on him and knocked him down on the bed. Staring at him, I frowned and growled. The punk was still smirking and acting like everything was perfect.

"Feisty as ever. I didn't know you like to be on top." I swear to the fucking stars, I wish I could see my face turn red.

"What do you want?" I asked slowly, trying to calm myself. NOT!! I'll always be on full blast when I'm around _**him**_.

"Answer-" ……..O-N-H-D. Okay, for you to understand., here's the full meaning: Oh no he didn't. Yes, prep sounding but it was called for. I, Karin Kurosaki, juvenile delinquent , leader of K3 was losing her first kiss to Toushirou Hitsugaya, boy genius, and leader of T2.

This was not possible. How could he…he…he just….BASTARD!!

Leaning me onto my back, he deepen the kiss further, sticking his foul tongue in my mouth. MY MOUTH! His hand went up my shirt to my bra strap which pissed me off even more. This was it. I had enough. Finally, I tore myself from his kiss and bit his neck.

That should show that bastard who's boss.

A laugh escaped his lips and I bit down harder. Why isn't this working!? He has to have some weakness.

"Why aren't you crying in fucking pain?" I said between bites. He escaped my bites of DOOM and removed my shirt. He placed kisses around my stomach and looked up at me. God, I hate him and his…..eyes!

"Because, I'm a masochist." What the fuck was a masochist?! I'll find out later but first, I have to save my ass from him. Stupid puberty. Squirming around, I finally escaped his embrace and placed my shirt back on.

"You are fun to play with." The punk said, smoking yet another cigarette. I clenched my fists, feeling the urge to punch his lights. The only flickin problem was 1. He was stronger than me…AT THIS MOMENT!! 2. I don't know any of his weaknesses. That made shit harder.

"What do you want!?" God, I wish I could squeeze his head until ice comes out and then I could make sno-cones out of him.

"Can I just visit a fellow enemy." Smirking, I felt a since of accomplishment. He better know that I'll be his enemy for eternity.

"No. I know you are after something and I won't stop till I find out what." I pointed towards him until pain surged in my head. I grabbed both sides of my head and groaned. The next thing I knew, I was being tied to the bed post. Both of my wrists and both of my ankles were being tied.

"There, that should do it." Damn him!! Taking advantage of my weakness to use for his own personal gain. I should kill him but, how can I do that with my hands and feet tied to the bedpost.

"Now, what should I do?" Watching this faggot walked back and forth was pure torture. Dammit! If only I could move. Since I was too lost in my thoughts of escape, I failed to notice the creep sneaking on top of me.

"Get off of me!" He continued to kiss on my neck and cheeks. God, this was like fucking torture. Ah the pain! He stopped and inched towards my legs or in between my legs. This was wrong man! This was wrong! Why!? Why must I lose my virginity to Toushirou Hitsugaya and in an infirmary too!

"Let's see how great you feel." This was it. My hands and feet were bounded and I could hear my zipper going down slowly. Why!? Why!? Why!? WHYYYYYYY!!

………………………………...

Pressure was off of me. Thank god! It seems like the pervert answered his phone. This was my chance to escape. Something that cuts. Something that cuts. Oh! A knife for..surgery and some stuff but that's not important. Only a couple of inches away. Okay, let me stick out my tongue and…and…grab it! Mission accomplish! Now to cut through the fabric. Let's see. Saw through it once…..twice….thrice….a quad…….a quint…..a sext……….and there we go!

Checking on iceberg, he was too occupied with his conversation to notice. Great! I untied the rest of my limbs and stood up. Zipping both my zipper up and combat boots, I searched for my leather jacket.

Damn! Right in front of him. How am I going to do this. Shit! Think Karin, think!

I eyed Toushirou and I eyed the needle on the side table. Smirking I grabbed the needle in my hand and snuck up behind iceberg. It would be easier to stick this in his neck but, where's the fun in that? Slowly I aimed the needle to the wall and shoot! I turned where Toushirou's body turn and quickly grabbed my leather jacket and sprinted out the door. Man, I wish I could stay and see his face but, I have to save myself first.

As I run down the hallways, I replayed the events that occurred in my head. I frowned and jump down the stairs and run out the front door. Onto the concrete, I slowed down and stared at the Nurse's window.

Damn him. He was eyeing me and smirking at me from the window. He winked and waved bye. I kicked the fence and walked down the sidewalk. Today reminded me of something I haven't said in like…………..30 paragraphs.

I hate him.

__

**To fucking hell.**

* * *

Finally gone from school and _**him**_, I walked until it was lunchtime. Sweet! I know exactly where to go. And exactly where to cause chaos.

McDonalds.

Yep, I was craving some fast food and since I snagged Ichigo's wallet when he wasn't looking, I could afford the meal I was about to order. One thing about McDonalds that I hate, I hated it's yellow and red colors. Too bright, though red is the shit, but too bright to stare at. I entered the restaurant and cut everybody in line. I even pushed an old lady out the way.

"Hey lady!" I yelled at the lady for not coming to me fast enough. Here's what I order and with pride and dignity. 12 double cheeseburgers, 10 French fries, 10 sodas, 20 apple pies, 2 McFlurries, 10 sundaes, 10 milkshakes(5 chocolate, 4 vanilla, 1 strawberry), and 3 happy meals for myself!! Everyone was shock. I could tell.

"Well, your total is-"

"I know what the total is." I may be a juvi DQ but I'm great in math. I suck at everything else. Handing her the right amount of money, I waited patiently for my orders. God, they are so fucking slow.

I looked back to see aggravated faces but, do I care. I do, really. …..YEAH RIGHT!! To hell with them all. They just have to wait like everyone else. Bastards. I did order like over 80 items(84 to be precise).

"Here you go ma'am" I watched as everything was placed in three giant bags. I opened my happy meals to find girl toys in all three of them.

"Whoa. Wait a minute. I don't do girl toys, so can you replaced these with boy ones." She took the toys from my hand and replaced them with boy toys in seconds. I inspected the toys and hold them up.

"Can I get another one, I already have these ones." She took them again, a little bit more angrily, and gave me three new ones.

"Sorry, another one." It was like that for a great five minutes until someone in the back yelled at me to hurry up.

"To hell with you old man!" I yelled back. I took the bags in my hands. As the lady came up to give me another batch of toys, I smiled and put on my innocent voice.

"I just remembered. I already have all of them. See ya!" With that said, I left McDonalds happily and walked for a great minute before frowning.

He hates fast food. He prefers homemade cooking instead. White haired bastard!

I hate him.

* * *

I arrived at an abandoned garage. The door was pitch black and a huge number 3 was in the middle. It was a nice red. I kicked the door to signal someone to open it. God, they are so slow. I thought we assigned someone to open the door. Finally, the door open slowly but, I was short enough to walk in when it wasn't at full height.

I sat the bags down on the end table and whistled. It echoed throughout the place which, I thought was pretty cool. A second later, everyone swarmed into the room and into the McDonalds bag. Let them at it, I don't care. As long as nobody touches those happy meals.

I sat down on the leather couch and lit a cigarette.

"Kurosaki-sama?" I looked up as Kenji, a subordinate of mines, approached me with all three of my happy meals in his hand. Grabbing my food from his hands, I opened them and stuffed five to six French fries in my mouth at once.

"Um, Kurosaki-sama. We have a problem." Glaring at Kenji, I swallowed and sighed.

"What is it?"

"You haven't come up with a plan yet. No offense Kurosaki-sama." I stared at Kenji while swallowing my fries. He was pissing me off. Of course I came up with a plan! I just don't feel like sharing it….but, it's so damn good I'm going to share it anyways.

"Well for your in-fo, I do have a plan. A plan that will destroy him inside out. A plan that will tear his world down. A plan that will turn his hair black! A plan-"

"I think we get it." I stared at them and crossed my arms. I stood up on the couch with a new wave of confidence. Everyone was staring. Yeah, I'm badass. Definitely.

"Well, if you want to know so much, I'll tell." All of them looked pathetic with facial expressions that yelled " TELL ME OR I'LL FUCKING HATE YOU!" . Smirking, I looked at all them.

"One word…two actually." I widen my smirk. I felt like a dictator with a successful plan. Well, I can't blame me, the plan is damn good. Toushirou won't see it coming. He'll start eating apples after this. Then, I frowned a little.

I hate him.

**I** like apples. He _loves_ watermelon. I believe and my beliefs are correct no matter what anybody says, watermelon is the worst fruit ever. It tastes like crap. Anyways, back to the plan.

"What are those two words." I heard someone yell from the crowd. I smirked yet again.

"Hinamori Momo."

The next time I speak. The plan will be clear. I see your faces. Who is this Hinamori Momo? Well, you'll see soon. Very soon. So soon you can smell burnt peaches. Yeah, I said it, burnt peaches. Before I leave I just have on thing to say. Toushirou is going to crash and burn.

……………………..

I hate him!

He likes ice instead of fire! That bastard!


	2. Graffiti 2: Two Minus One

_**RIOT!**_

**Graffiti 2: Two Minus One**

I hate him.

I hate him for many reasons actually. And it's not about the petty things either. My hatred for Toushirou Hitsugaya extends deep into the depths of my soul. Seriously.

It wasn't always like this. We use to be friends, well almost like friends. It was more than that actually. Way more. Even though saying this is going to kill me(painfully might I add), he was someone I could truly call my best friend. I met him back in elementary school. I had a gang that consisted of me and my soccer peers. Back then Toushirou hung out with only one person: no one. He was…a total loner, I guess. He never talked to anyone; not even the teacher. He would just sit and stare off quietly into space by himself. I didn't want to talk to him or even be near him. You'll never hear me say this again. NEVER EVER again, but…

He scared me.

Royally.

He just seemed so….icy. Like nothing could ever get to him. He was too cold, too distant. Just so not there. How could you be there, but not at the same time was confusing to me. He was like a statue, motionless, unapproachable. With him it was like I didn't even existed or no one for that matter. One day I was dared to kick him off the monkey bars and because I never refused a dare I accepted the challenge. The little prick never saw it coming. The way his mouth opened and the way he flailed his arms around was way beyond funny. Everyone, and I mean everyone, laughed as I walked to stand in front of him. He was covered in dirt and he had a bruise on his leg. He looked absolutely pathetic!

…However, despite the satisfaction I got from seeing him miserable I couldn't help the guilty feeling that immediately invaded me when I looked at his face. Dirt was smudged all over his face and it was even in his hair.

But his eyes froze me to the ground. It was like looking through half-frozen ice. His eyes were clear. It was like nothing could reach the water behind the ice. His emotions swirled around each other behind the surface. Kind of like water. I could see everything: anguish, loneliness, longing, desire, anger, rejection, every negative emotion possible. Those emotions cowered behind deep, impenetrable emerald green.

I'll never forget that look he gave me. Not even now. Because of that look I apologized(for the first time in my life). Because of those unshed tears I began sitting next to him. Because of those eyes I began talking to him. Because of those gorgeous green eyes I began to like him.

And because of that I fell into his trap. Now that I look back on it all I realize that I had set myself up for failure.

XxX~XxX

Fuck the past, and fuck the future. I look towards my mirror to stare at my brand new accessories. Seven studs adorned each of my ears. Three were located at the corner of my ear and four rested on the skin of my lobe. I needed a change. Another one. I'm quite proud of myself for piercing my ears without trouble. Of course they hurt like hell. Being stoned doesn't help either. Painful pulses from the holes vibrate through my entire body.

Oh well, fuck it. Pain is just another emotion after all. It can be controlled. With more Mary Jane!

As I search through my drawer for my sack and papers, I can't help but notice that several rocks were hitting my window. What the hell? Nobody ever threw anything at my window. They knew better. If someone wanted to see me they could just call. What do people think cell phone are for? So anyways, I open the window and stuck my torso out to get a good luck around. I didn't see shit at first until I looked down below my window.

It was _him_.

He was looking back up at me with a cocky grin on his face. He was shirtless with black khakis, a white skully, and Converse. He had something clutched in his hand. But I can't see it nor do I give a fuck! Why is he here?

"What the hell do you want? I hope you know that I hate you!" I scowled as he laughed at me. What was so damn funny? I am so ready to hit him with my Ipod speaker when he opened his hand.

He had a blunt with him.

"I wanted to talk, but I know you won't come out unless I bait you." He waved the blunt at me and sadly I can't keep my eyes from following his every move.

"C'mon. You know you want to. It's not everyday you get to smoke Purp." Dammit! He has me. Japan was such an asshole when it came to marijuana and getting high quality green like Purple was rare.

God, I hate him!

But I love green!(I support the environment!). He had me, but I wasn't going to admit it.

…..Not verbally anyways. He was still staring at me as I bit my lip as I struggled with the internal debate on whether to go or not. I was going. Definitely. I don't know why I'm wasting time contemplating. I grab my cigarettes before I walk out of my room. I met him at the edge of my house where the windows to my room and Ichigo's were located. He was still grinning.

I fucking hate him. He's such a cocky bastard. I lean against the wall quietly as he fires up. I can't help but sneak a glance at him. The light from the fire gave his tan skin a soft orange glow that sparkled in his eyes. He was looking down as he rotated the blunt in the flame. His lips were parted and they just looked….so inviting.

NO! Get a grip, Karin! Don't fall into the trap. You know better! I look away and cross my arms over my chest. Smoke is in the air and he suddenly stands beside me. I can feel his eyes on me, but I refuse to look at him. If I stare at his eyes I know I would lose this battle. The battle of old emotions. The battle of painful reality.

He passes the blunt off to me which I take quietly(surprisingly). I smoke in silence as I wait for him to say something. Anything.

"What do I have to do to get you back?"

…He just blew my mind with that question. Back? Hahahaha! Seriously? Does he really think we're going to have this **conversation**? The same conversation we have almost every time were alone. The same exchange of words we spoke almost a few months ago. Ha, yeah right.

I pass him the blunt before blowing smoke through my mouth and nostrils. I know he's waiting on an answer. He smokes in silence but his gaze is once again on me. Waiting. Expecting. Possibly hoping. Hoping for a good answer. One he's not going to get. Not in this lifetime.

"Nothing, because you-"

"Have no chance whatsoever." He finishes for me. I narrow my eyes at him. He matches the intensity of my gaze tenfold. He passes the blunt back which I take while still glaring at him. Why did he even bother to ask this dumbass question if he already knows the answer?

"You've said that like a million times already and you should stop because we both know it's not true." Wow! He's grown a pair in only a few hours! Since when did he think he could command me? Me of all people? I pass the blunt back as I unfold my arms to place them on my hips as I stare at him.

"Maybe you think it's not true, but I know that it is. Be real Toushirou! Do you think that you can change everything back to the way it was?" He blows smoke as a response. I don't even know why I'm trying. It's not even worth it. But like I said earlier. Whenever he's around I'll always be on full blast. Especially when I'm baked. When I'm high it seems like I can't stop my real feelings from showing. Like right now. I just want to ruin him! I really do, but….I honestly don't know how to do that without ruining myself first.

Fuck it! He has to know. He has to know how I really feel!

"You know, I use to be so so sooooo so so in love with you. Those six months we're best of my life. You use to make me so happy. You made me feel so alive. But damn, if I knew you were an actual ice prince I probably would've stayed away. Save myself the heartache. I mean do you even know what you've turned me into after that night?" He nods his head no and I take the blunt as he passes it off. I'm no where near finish yet. I smoke in between my rant.

"No? Well let me tell you. I stayed up for the entire day after that wondering in the woods just to find some sort of stability. But you know it's not possible. It just wasn't. Everything I thought I knew, everything I thought was real turned out to be false. Wrong. Nowhere near being true. I really thought that…I knew you, but wow I was wrong! So fucking wrong!"

"You're not! I swear I didn't do anything! Nothing at all! I-" He sighs and looks up towards the sky for a second before starting again, " I know you can change your boyfriends easily, but you can change your friends too! She is lying to you! Still is. I would never even think about me and her in that kind of way. Why would I when I have you?"

"Had." Damn right. He was going to know that what we _had _is over. For good. He takes the blunt back.

"No, have." He takes one more puff before tossing the roach over the neighbor's fence. He then looks towards me before stepping forward and placing his arms on either side of my head. He leans down and I can tell he plans to descend onto my lips. I push his arms away, but before I could move away he grabs both of my arms and grips both of them together in one of his hands.

I struggled. Trust me. I tried, but he's too got damn strong(you didn't hear this from me)! He pins me to the wall and I look up at him. Honestly, I just feel like crying. I won't. I can't. Crying is a sign of weakness, vulnerability. I can't bare myself to him by crying right before his eyes. If I did that then he would've win this round.

"Fuck you! You're an asshole! A cold, heartless asshole! I hate you!" I stop struggling as I use all my strength to stop my tears that were ready to fall over. I just….can't do this. His scent is all around me, hugging me. Caressing me. Filling me. The touch of his skin is like fire against me(amazingly for someone so cold, literally). The short breaths that escape from his parted lips brush against my neck. Each warm breath sends my heart in a frenzy, a familiar frenzy. Each pulse makes me want to cry, but at the same time get closer to him.

"I hate you! I fucking hate you! I-" Our eyes meet. Bitter ebony against a cooling green.

I couldn't do it. I just couldn't. So laugh it up everyone because I officially admit defeat. There's just no way I can win against him. Not when I'm still confused about my feelings.

He leans in and…..I also lean forward. His lips are soft against mine. Like they always been. He blows smoke into my mouth which I suck down into my lungs. We part as I blow the smoke out. The cloud goes into his face and mines as it exits up into the air.

Then we're back at it. I open my mouth for him, and he slides his tongue inside. His tongue is soft and wet. It touches the tip of my tongue before swimming underneath to bring my tongue up to dance. And dance we did. I swirl around him. He massages me before going even deeper.

It was like it was six months ago all over again. I fight him, he fights me, we stop to take a breath before going back for round two. We part and we both let out jagged pants as we stare at each other.

I can see it. I've always seen it.

The love, adoration, respect, friendship.

It was still there.

He kisses my bottom lip softly and slowly before releasing his grip on my hands. I couldn't think properly nor could I find the strength to speak. I could only…..cooperate. He hoisted me up on the wall by my waist where my legs were on either side of him. I wrapped my arms around his neck before meeting his lips halfway.

This kiss was deeper. Wetter. Fiercer.

His hands traveled along my curves before dipping underneath the fabric of my red tank. I sighed happily as he felt around my stomach and sides. His touch was an addiction. The way his warm hands brushed against some of my sensitive spots in exploration was enough to make me go crazy.

While he caresses me, our kiss continues. As he gently bites my lower lip I slip my hands into his soft snow white hair. His hair was silk against my fingers and I gripped his hair as his hand goes up against my chest.

Honestly guys, he was making me rain. I couldn't help it! He knew my body like the back of his hand. I can feel him against my thigh. Prodding against me to alert me about his excitement. This in turn excites me more. I wrap my legs around him to bring him closer.

I wanted him. Oh, I wanted him so fucking badly. I always did. I've just been lying to myself this entire time.

'_Dude, check out Toushirou's status! Rin posted something I thought you might want to see.'_

Right? I've just been lying to myself.

'_Last night was fun. Let's do it again sometime. __J'_

Right?

'_We didn't.'_

Right?

'_You're not the only one in his life.'_

…..Right?

…..No, I'm wrong. Feelings aside, I can't just forget his betrayal. He's lying! He's been lying the whole time!

I break the kiss slowly before unwrapping my legs from around him and putting my feet back to the ground. Back to reality. I break away from him and stumble backwards a few steps.

I probably look like a mess. Strands of black hair fall into my face, my eyes are glassy with desire, my lips are kiss swollen and bright pink, and my body is shivering from the absence of his touch. He looks at me with concern and takes a step forward. I shake my head. I can't. I don't want him near me. Not now, not ever! Obviously he's not going to leave so I'm going to.

I flip him off before running back into my house and slamming the door behind. I can't even hold myself up anymore. I do nothing as I slide down my front door with my face buried in my hands.

How can he put me together then tear me down over and over again? How can I just fall back into…..no fuck it. Just don't think about it. But how can I not think about it when his touch still lingers on me. It just wasn't possible. I look up to stare at nothing when I finally decide to go to my room. I close my bedroom door behind me before glancing at myself in my mirror.

I was right. I looked like a hot mess(I love that song by Cobra Starship!). And boy did I look so high! My eyes were as red as Renji's hair. Seriously. Right now all I wanted to do was sleep, munch, and smoke some more. I shiver before I laid down on my bed with my back to the mirror and window. I didn't want to see myself. I didn't want to be reminded of the biggest mistake I just made. I didn't want to face my own self.

God I hate being a teenager. It's so difficult not to get emotionally attached to everything.

I look at my cell phone before deciding to text Hinamori. Everything that happened today just reminded me that I only had one shot of revenge. I was going to destroy Toushirou. I was going to destroy him for destroying me.

Tomorrow after school is a party. A party everyone is going to. Even Toushirou. I'll go, but not alone. Oh no, Hinamori's coming with me and phase one of my operation will commence.

I promised I would explain the plan to you guys, but honestly my mind is obviously not in the right place. That's how powerful he is. He can put my mind through turmoil. So anyways, I'll catch up to you guys later. I just need…a break right now.

I mean I deserve one right?

God, I hate him!

If you haven't noticed by now then I would have to say you're pretty slow, but I'll explain it anyways.

I use to be in a relationship with Toushirou Hitsugaya for six months.

I'm in….no I **use** to be in love with Toushirou Hitsugaya.

And I hate myself for it.


	3. Graffiti 3: Three Minus One

**Author's Note:** I'm back! And on a roll too! I have to say this is the longest chapter I ever written but you guys make it worth it. I would also like to state that I'm going to be changing the rating from T to M after this chapter. Once you read what's below you'll understand why. :)

If you have any questions I'll be glad to answer them. So now onto the disclaimer!

**Disclaimer: I DON'T OWN Bleach, anything related to Durarara!, or any corporations that are mentioned.**

**Lyrics by: Crossfade, "Cold"**

* * *

_**RIOT!**_

**Graffiti 3: Three Minus One**

_Shoron_(緒論)

Bats.

In both our culture and Chinese culture the creature of the night stands for happiness. If there are five bats then they all stand for the Five Happinesses:

Wealth. Peace. Longevity. Cultivation of virtue. A good death.

All in all bats stand for general happiness and that's why they are our gang's emblem. K3 is only an abbreviation for our entire name. The "K" stands for komori which is Japanese for bat and the three stands for the Five Happinesses. In our gang we only uphold three out of the Five Happinesses. We stand for peace, longevity, and a good death. Despite being a gang we uphold peace within one's self, their family and community, and within in the gang. We preach longevity because it's essential to live a long life. Life is too short and there's one too many things to do in such a short amount of time. Many live their lives without realizing how easy it is to lose it. How easy it is to lose the smile that graces your face.

How easy it is to lose love. Especially.

Then last but not least we support dying a peaceful death which should come as a result from both peace and longevity. I preach this more than anyone. I have my reasons, many personal reasons anyway. If you ever stop to think about it what would be the point in living a great life only to die tragically, unexpectedly, not purposefully. There's a reason ghosts stick around after death. You're not done. At least not done with life. You want retribution, a second chance but unfortunately death doesn't offer second chances. So you stick around as a ghost only to watch the living waste their lives in different ways. It would suck, right? So I tell my gang that having a good death is just as important as having a good life.

Anyways, with the combination of those three rules they put the "3" and komori puts the "K" in K3. We are formally known as "The Troubled Black Bats". Locally known as "The Black Bats" or "K3". That's us and don't you forget it!

XxX~XxX

I can still feel her.

Gentle fingertips graze across my skin in search if an erogenous spot. Sweet lips torture mine in sinful admission as she arches her curvy back delectably. She falls into my touch and I drown in her essence while mentally trying to incorporate myself into her. To become one with her.

A breath. A kiss.

Our tongues swipe against each other; she slides underneath before pushing against me to motivate me to dance.

Her taste. It's a combination of strawberries, mint, cigarettes, and(at the time) sweet, sweet marijuana.

Oh, how I love her taste!

I love it so much that I can still taste it on my tongue. I've been reluctant to spit because I would feel like if I did I'll never be able to drown myself in berries and smoke. I'll never be able to taste her again.

It's already bad enough that I can't hold her like I use to anymore.

It's only been a day since she pushed me away, and my nerves are still practically wracked; even now. It wasn't because of the rejection, faaarrr from it actually(we were only making out a few moments before). It was the look in her eyes.

Betrayal. Denial. Worthlessness.

It was as if it was six months ago all over again.

I shrunk under her intense gaze, like my not too recent growth spurt dissipated. I felt like I was thirteen; clueless and very unsure why she was so mad that she was on the brink of tears. Then she flipped me off before calling deuces and hightailed it back inside her house.

I felt like shit after that.

The glorious high the purple monster granted me was gone as I made the journey back home…alone. By the time I got home I was cold.

Cold. Rejected. And utterly lonely.

I saw all of those emotions in my eyes and past those I saw it deep within my soul.

XxX~XxX

But never mind yesterday. It doesn't matter anymore. Well… that's not exactly true. It did matter. A lot actually. Yesterday was a giant "Q & A" interview wrapped up in one whole afternoon. It wasn't a waste. Faaarrr from it. I got my answer, though it's not as clear cut as I would want it to be. But it's an answer nonetheless.

She still loves me.

I saw it in her eyes. I felt it through her skin. I tasted it through her lips. She wouldn't admit it( I think Karin would shoot herself with a loaded twelve gauge before admitting that she felt something other than hate for me), but I know her. I know her well. Very well.

I flip my lighter backwards* before lighting my packed-to-the-brim bowl. I suck in the smoke before releasing it in the air. The cloud floats with the wind before disappearing into itself. I can feel the high at the back of my head as I close my eyes to the world. My head reels around the many images that bounce around carelessly.

She was in everyone of them.

Almost.

She wasn't there when I logged onto Facebook that summer night. Only I saw the message on my wall(at least I thought I was the only one). I read it not only once, not only twice, and not only thrice but more than seven times. With each typed word I could feel a new crack emerge within my emotional psyche. Then another. Then another.

Another. Another crack that deepened.

That message literally destroyed my life. Because of that-well for a lack of a better word- _bitch_ everything that I held dear was taken from me. She basically destroyed everything of mines. Well not really everything. She wasn't that important, but _Karin_ surely was!

To me. Karin was everything.

My everything.

Maaannn, lately I've been finding myself wishing for a time machine to change the past. Maybe then everything will be alright in the world.

I think?

No, I know. Everything would be alright. The sound of screeching tires pulled me out of my thoughts. My first instinct was to put the bong away. The last thing I needed was for the cops to ruin my day when I already felt like shit. Today is not a good day. But of course there was not a single cop in sight, but merely Shuuhei and Renji pulling up on their bikes.

"Wassup, Shiro." Ugh. I hate that name, but despite my momentary resentment I dapped Renji up before doing the same with Shuuhei. Man, now that I think about it it's really been a long time since the three of us just sat, talked, and smoked some bowls. Renji's been off trying to get into Byakuya's pants(even if he denies it. We all KNOW Renji has some GAY tendencies) and Shuuhei's been working with Kensei, who runs the weapon store in District 9. Of course I never really left a lot of room in my schedule for my friends, but I left plenty of room for her.

Always.

Speaking of which, I need to vent to somebody about the current events. I grabbed the pretty blue bong from behind the pole. I repack a bowl before passing it on, along with the story.

"Alright so listen. Yesterday, I went to Kurosaki's to-"

"Relieve some mega sexual tension." What? That's not even true!…yeah that's a lie. I was already frustrated because I hadn't been laid in 3 months, and she just looked so…inviting. Her eyes had me shivering. The way she moved her hips had 'me' twitching. And her lips called out to me. Every move she made affected me and I couldn't control myself any longer. Luckily for me the perfect opportunity came so I was able to release my frustration.

At least a little bit.

"No, _Renji_." I emphasized his name to show my non-existent appreciation for his remark. "Anyways, I went over to her house to smoke a blunt and to talk ya' know. Because it's( regarding the incident that won't be named) complete bullshit and I'm not going to give up."

"So you guys had the talk again? For like what? The 150th time? Dude, you really don't give up." Shuuhei said as he hit the bong. Renji snickered in the background, obviously amused. I smirk before reclaiming my bong and toking. I come backup; talking while holding the smoke in which takes my voice down a few pitches.

"Damn right." Smoke blown out. I pass to Renji who questions me as he hits.

"So what else did you guys do? There's no way you guys just sat, smoke and talked like passive little Catholics." Hahaha, passive little Catholics? That's new.

"Well we started to talk, but she didn't want to. She got very pissed and cussed me out and then…."We made out. But it's always better to leave them hanging. They both looked at me and then raised their eyebrows to egg me on, but that's not going to work. Eventually Shuuhei gave up on waiting.

"Then what? What the fuck happened?" I shrug my shoulders then switched my attitude to nonchalance.

"Nothing really. We just made out." It definitely wasn't nothing. It was something al-

"WOAH WOAH WOAH woah…woah. First, I got resin all over my fingers trying to take this shit out. You need to clean this, seriously. But secondly, you guys just made out?" I laughed at Renji's overdramatic way of asking a question.

"Uh duh. That's what I just said."

"Fuck you."

"So she cussed you out and then you ate her face?"

"No, I was tired of her bitching so I decided to shut her up. It worked too." Insert cheeky smile. When she gave in I felt like I won the fucking Olympics!

Shuuhei gazed off for some contemplation. He looked high as fuck so it's no wonder why it's taking him a little minute to process what I just said.

"Did you buy it?" I froze as the oh so sweet voice confronted Shuuhei. Heh, maybe he wasn't gazing off after all.

Standing in front of us, in front of me, was Karin. Looking pretty hot might I add.

For once she wore the school uniform….well at least part of it(some people never change). The white collared shirt hugged her frame nicely(especially on her bust). Instead of the red bowtie she accessorized the shirt with a black, white, red, and gray plaid tie. The shorts matched the tie and were holding my attention for quite sometime until I brought myself to look up to her gorgeous face. From her lips. Those sweet red lips, to that cute button nose, to(finally) her deep impenetrable eyes.

Green clashes against ebony.

She looks away a few seconds later before looking towards Shuuhei again giving him the "wtf r u doin?" look which reminded him that she was there for a reason.

"Oh my bad. I was just…staring at that hickey on your neck. It's kind of bad. Had a fun night?" Hickey? What hickey? Who the fuck? Oh…wait I did that. Hahahaha yeah I remember now. True to Shuuhei's word there was a purplish bruise resting on her neck. Karin, who had a major frown on her face, covered the bruise with her dark tresses. God, how I miss running my fingers through her silky, black hair. I miss the way she would purr in contempt, very much like a kitten.

…..Dammit! Why aren't we together? Because she thinks I'm a cheating, lying bastard that's why. Wow way to answer my own question. I look back at her and wondered….

Why are you so close, yet…

So far away?

Shuuhei handed her the brand new pack of NPs(my favorite brand of cigarettes) and she thanked him before sliding them into her book bag. Right then I thought she was going to leave; leave with her amiable friend silence, but then she looked towards Renji.

"Ichi-nii told me to tell you that he has a date that he's taking with him to the party and that he won't be able to pick you up, but I'm ridin' with Hiyori so you can catch a ride with us." What the fuck? Where was this sudden generosity coming from? Then I remembered that I was the only one she truly hated, so of course everybody who wasn't named "Toushirou Hitsugaya" got special treatment. Or maybe I was the only one who got special attention. Like "I keel you*" special attention. Despite my fruitless effort to justify her intensive hate for me it still didn't help kill the ever growing jealousy within me.

Renji and Karin made small conversation as I lit a cigarette to bring my anxiety levels down. I fucking hate emotions.

Seriously. While I was trying to suffocate the green monster with smoke. I failed to notice the exchange of goodbyes and fist bumps and I failed to notice that my desire was slowly walking away.

I also failed to notice that she stopped.

I only came back to Earth when I felt a pair of eyes staring at me. I glanced towards her to meet her gorgeous eyes staring right back me.

Only me.

She scowls before [reluctantly] walking towards me.

Only me.

She stopped in front of me before bending down to my level. Of course when someone comes close to your face you naturally think they're going to kiss you. Well I got a little hopeful, but contained my disappointment when she leaned in towards my ear.

Seriously, what a tease.

"Meet me in the library during lunch. We need to talk." About?

"About?" Oops, didn't mean for that to come out. She stood back up before walking away.

"Well you'll have to wait till lunch, won't ya?" I watched as she walked away while taking out her red IPOD before watching her ride off on her bike.

I hate to see her go, but I love to watch her leave.

I knew right away that I just said that out loud as both Shuuhei and Renji snickered. Ah whatever. It's already been said so there's no point in trying to defend myself. Watching Karin ride off reminded me that I too needed to go to school before I'm late. But of course that really wasn't my main motivation for going.

I wanted to know.

I wanted to know what was going to happen between us.

I had to know. I just had to.

I picked up my blue bong and returned it to it's rightful place inside the vase. I lock my front doors and I gave my friends deuces before embarking on my walk to school. I plugged in my earphones in my ears before selecting a particular song. In some odd way I can't help but think about us as the first verse kicked in.

"_Looking back at me I see that I never really got it right"_

"_I never stop to think of you"_

"_I'm always wrapped up in things I can not win"_

Back then all of that was true. I was used to being alone so having a girlfriend didn't really settle with me. As soon as she asked me out(in a very VERY nontraditional way) I felt weighted down.

Like I was chained to her.

Just like a dog to a doghouse.

I hated that feeling. I couldn't stand it! But because it was her I tried to tolerate it. But the more I tried the more I failed. I tried to distance myself, not thinking about her. I busied myself with gang activity while also chasing my distant dream of finding love(even though it was right in front of me).

"_You are the antidote that gets me by"_

"_Something strong like a drug that gets me high"_

Listening to the lyrics I now realize that all of it was true. When I found out the _**truth**_ I was drowning in sorrow; sick with depression. But she was there for me when I needed her the most.

Like a cure.

That night was our first kiss and no amount of marijuana could bring me to the level of high that she took me to. She was way stronger than weed.

She was like a pill(maybe Oxycodone or Lortab). When I had her she brought me a high that I grew addicted to. When I didn't I dropped down in the low kind of like I was in withdrawal.

Heh, now I'm in a permanent withdrawal.

"_What I really meant to say is I'm sorry for the way I am"_

"_I never meant to be so cold"_

"_Never meant to be so cold"_

I remember now. This song. It was playing that night. The night I lost her because of a liar. I remembered now how her face looked that night. Face flushed red, cheeks tear stained, fresh bruises on her knuckles.

And undeniable sadness.

Now I'm crying inside because-

"What I really meant to say is I'm sorry for the way I am." Unknowingly I started to sing as I dwell back into the past.

"I never meant to be so cold." I really didn't. I never meant to be an asshole or a heartless bastard. Really, I never meant to be so cold…Karin.

"_Never meant to be so-"_

~XxX~XxX~

"Cold to you. I'm sorry about all the lies." Hahaha, yeah right. I never told a lie to that asshole. Not one. Nadda. Zero. Zelch. But he told me plenty. I'm sure of it.

"Maybe in a different light you can see me stand on my own again." My black Chuck's pedal along as I quietly cruise down the street with one hand on the handle and the other on my cigarette. I don't know what got over me, but after seeing his face I just _had_ to listen to…our song.

It was nowhere near romantic(and I know you're thinking "then why share a song?"), but it did describe our relationship.

Really well, might I add.

"Cause now I can see me. You are the antidote that got me by. Something strong like a drug that got me…" High. Oh so high! Everything he did got me high. When he touched me I became chilled. When he kissed me I became pretty high. When he rubbed me down there I was baked. And when those slender fingers slipped gently and slowly into me I was completely toasted!*

Ugh! Fuck this song!

Everytime I listen to it I just go back to that night. That night I'll never forget. Oh my gawd! Why is life so complicated?

Naw, it's not life. It's relationships.

Relationships suck ass.

I fucking hate dating.

"_What I really meant to say is I'm sorry for the way I am"_

"_I never meant to be so cold"_

"_Never meant to be so cold"_

Despite my earlier protest I continued to listen to the song while pedaling along; edging closer to school. The guitar solo kicks in as I take my last drag from my cigarette before tossing it randomly on the concrete.

"_I never really wanted you to see the screwed up side of me that I keep"_

"_Locked up inside me so deep"_

"_It always seems to get to me"_

I dismount my bike as I arrive at school. Despite the morbid song still playing, my mind continues to go back to that night. My mind is not in the gutter. I swear! But let's be honest. They say that sex is always on the human mind, whether they know it or not. And I'm starting to see that they are right. It's like every time I see him, I feel him.

Between my legs that is. Hahaha.

I'm not ashamed to admit that I've only been fingered by one guy(….two actually, but that's another story for a different day). I don't take pride in having many guys under my belt. In fact I only want to be with an exceptional number of guys(preferably I would like to count the number on my hand)! I don't want to be called a slut(not like I would care) so I keep my relations to a minimum or on the DL*.

Anyways, back to dickhead. He was the first to see 'me' and the first to make me feel so indescribably good. Even as I walk to class, I can still feel me.

He had technique.

A lot of technique.

Dammit! I don't even know why I'm thinking about this! I hate him. With a passion.

…But I love his fingers. Hahaha.

"Kaiwwaaaa! It's Hitsugaya-sempai!" Wow, really? Stupid freshies. But despite my hostility I stop to look out the enormous widow that overlooks the entire front of the school.

Oh, he's here alright. He just walked through the gate with his uniform looking tidy, his hands in his pockets, …and a scowl? Hmmm, I wonder why? He looks up suddenly then stops as his eyes land on me.

….

We stare at each other for like ever. One from the window and the other from the ground. I felt uneasy, but I refuse to break eye contact and luckily for me I didn't. Because he looks away first.

….

There's a draft in here now. Maybe it's from him walking inside the building. Heh, whatever. The thing is that earlier I don't think it was unease I was feeling. I'm pretty sure I was feeling anxious. Anxious to start the plan. But mainly anxious to hear his answer to the question. I turn away from the window before walking to class, while thinking…

Toushirou.

Do you still love me?

~XxX~XxX~

"CHOCO TACOS! SELLING CHOCO TACOS FOR 500 YEN!"…..What the fuck is a Choco Taco? It's lunch finally and I was just about to walk inside the library until I noticed the ice cream cart standing right outside the entrance. Some dude from the classroom next door to mines was dressed up as an ice cream cone and waved a sign around that was written in kanji.

Sign: CHOCO TACOS FOR SALE!

"What the hell is a Choco Taco?" I just had to ask. It's not everyday that you see some strange kid dressed up selling even stranger creamy delights.

"What's a Choco Taco? WHAT'S A CHOCO TACO? You don't know what a Choco Taco is?"

"No motherfucker I don't. I wouldn't be asking if I knew." How dumb can you be? In fact I'm so annoyed now that I don't even want to know! So before hearing the much awaited answer I walk into the library.

Our library is pretty huge. After they renovated the school(a few years after Ichi-nii graduated) they tore down the old library to expand the cafeteria, but luckily for us the library got its own building right next to the gym. It's pretty spacious with an upstairs for studying and plenty of books for me to read(though I only read about drugs, gangs, sex, y'know stuff I can relate to). Right away I can tell he's not here. I mean it's pretty hard not to see crystal snow white hair(hmmmmmm…maybe I should call him Snow White). Ah well, I guess I should wait for him.

I walk up the steps to the second floor before plopping down in the seat and crossing my legs and arms. It's a position of authority, a position you can't possibly defy. At least I would like to think so. I look around the almost deserted study hall before taking out my phone. I checked my messages under the table while scanning for any incoming librarians. I had ten new text messages in my inbox.

What the hell? I'm pretty sure there isn't an emergency. Maybe it's about the party.

Hmmmm….two from Jinta, one from Yuzu(who is coming back tomorrow!), one from Dad, two from Ichi-nii, one from my friend in Shinjuku, two from Matsumoto(who I haven't talked to in forever!), and…one from Hinamori. Immediately I clicked on her message and scanned the message.

Message From:

(XXX)XXX-XXXX

Hinamori Momo

Meet u at 4. I hav boy issues 2 attend 2 after skool. C u soon!

Received:

10:23 a.m.

X/X/XX

I couldn't help but allow a smile to slip onto my face. In the three months that we've known each other I have come to love this girl! At first I thought she was some dumb bimbo(the first time I saw her she tripped on air. Who the hell trips on air?), but after sharing two joints and talking for almost five hours I've actually come to like her. I thought she was kind of pretty with shoulder length chocolate brown hair(that she either kept up in a bun or down) and big moe mocha eyes. She's only an inch taller than me since she's older than me by two years. However, she's not a fighter. Verbally she could kick anybody's ass. She's good at acting and manipulating(something she picked up from her boss who she has a MAJOR crush on), but she doesn't use her abilities unless it's absolutely needed, or if a friend needed her help.

Like me.

At first I thought she wasn't going to follow through with the plan, but after I told her how much of a dick he was she agreed immediately. The plan was simple really(kind of cruel too, but hey can you give cheaters the benefit of the doubt?). That bastard broke my heart so I'm going to break his…..without actually having to do it! Hinamori gets with the bastard, make him fall in love, then break his heart just like he did mines. See?

It's simple.

I began to reply to Hinamori while at the same time keeping an eye out for any administrators. I'll be damned if they take my-

"Who are you texting? Is it a boy?"

Well lookey here. He finally arrived. He looks pissed too as he takes a seat across from me( he knew better than to sit next to me). I hit the send button and put my phone away while I gave him a cold glare.

"It's not any of your business. It's not like we're dating." That hit a vital point as I see him retract a little bit. But he covered it up easily as he slipped on a smirk.

"We should be."

"I don't give cheaters second chances." A sigh. Then he runs his fingers through his hair(that…silky spiky white hair) before finally speaking.

"So what did you want to ask me?" Hmm, well there was a lot of questions to ask, but I decided to settle for five out of the four hundred twenty(420!*) questions I had in mind. I uncrossed my arms to lean in a little closer.

"Well…..what was yesterday all about?" I'm still confused(both mentally and emotionally). We argued, smoked a blunt, argued again, then made out. Did any of that make sense to you?

"I don't know. You tell me." Oh my gawd he is pissing me off! I growl in warning before trying to regain my composure.

"You have five seconds to answer my question before I reach over this table and stick you right in your face!" Failed attempt at being calm.

"Ha, you wish. But since you don't seem to be in a joking mood I'll just get straight to the point." About damn time! I ceased my silent seething and buried my animus to hear him out.

"Yesterday I was trying to see if you felt something stronger for me then animosity, and by the way you kissed back I was proven right."

"I don't love you anymore." ….Wow that came out pretty fast. Now he won't believe me!

"I don't believe you." I knew it! I literally wanted to face palm myself but I damn sure wasn't going to.

"Well it doesn't matter what you believe, now does it?" Nice save. He narrowed his eyes at that. Uh oh! I think I hit another vital point.

"I think it does. Especially since my belief is right." How conceited can you be?

"Bullshit!"

"No, it's not. If I'm wrong why did you kiss me back?"….He had me. Yesterday I actually felt hope. I felt that familiar love again.

"It takes two to tango, y'know."

"Well I don't want to dance. Especially when my last partner stepped on my toes." Now it's time for him to be silent. He knew what I just said was true. He was silent for quite sometime until he finally spoke with a sigh.

"For once I actually don't have a comeback."…..I couldn't help but laugh at this. It's not everyday that you see the almighty Hitsugaya-taichou (that's what everyone calls him since he's the captain of the soccer team) speechless. A small smile crossed his face as I settled down from my fit of laughter.

"Wow that's rare. Usually I can't get you to shut up."

"Usually you don't use analogies. About time you pay attention in class."

"Oh fuck you." This is weird. Super weird. I hate him. I really do. I'll never forgive him, but yet I can't help but smile. Just like yesterday. I couldn't help but kiss him back. It's like I'm-

"I did not cheat, and I want you to believe me. I don't like her. Hell, I don't even find her attractive and she's not my type. I only have eyes for you. I'll only love you." His eyes softened as he continued," I'm sorry. For a lot of things actually. I'm sorry that I kind of treated you like shit the first few months, and that it took me this long to realize how important you are to me."

…..I don't even know what to say. Now I'm speechless.

"It kills me everyday to be this close to you, but know that I can never get closer." …..Still speechless but definitely curious at the moment. I couldn't form a single sentence within my throat though.

"And what pisses me off the most is that I can't get closer to you because of a lie. I don't understand how you could believe her before you could believe me."

"Did you really?" Question two out of five.

"No. I would never even look at her! You were all I ever needed. You was everything I ever wanted. You still are."

"Then why would she lie?" Question three out of five. I'm having second thoughts now. I never did stop to believe him, but why would Rin lie? We use to be good friends, but then we got into a major fight. I kicked her ass pretty badly and we haven't talked since. Except in the hallways at school. I would walk past her and she would make some kind of snide remark. I don't pay her any attention though. I got better things to attend to.

"I don't know. I really don't."

"So you didn't kiss her at the party?" Question four out of five. This is the main question that runs through my mind. According to Matsumoto(who told me the whole story since she was there too). Toushirou was dancing with Rin(quite provocatively), and before that he got mad drunk after drowning seven glasses of whiskey mixed with sprite. While they were in the middle of dancing, Rin kissed Toushirou and he kissed back. They basically made out in the middle of the dance floor. Then they went upstairs and locked the bedroom door.

"No." That's it? Usually he says more than that.

"So you're telling me that Matsumoto is lying to me?" Question five out of five. I know for a fact that she wouldn't lie. Rangiku's not like that. She's always been a straight forward person. If she didn't like you, she would tell you. If she wanted to fuck your dude, she would tell you. She wouldn't lie to me like that. She has no reason to. I saw it in her eyes. The frown on her face told more than her words.

"What? What did she tell you?"

"That you made out with her and then took her upstairs like a cheap slut." Oh oh. Here comes my friend anger and his partner in crime jealously.

"I swear that never happened."

"So you didn't get mad drunk at the party?" Question six out of five. It's a spur of the moment type thing.

"I did. I'm not going to deny that. You would too if you were there."

"And then it would've been me that you took upstairs?" Some days I like to mind fuck guys. I wonder if he's going to slip up on this question.

"But I never took anyone upstairs. And I would never take you upstairs to a bedroom in some random guy's house. I would want you on _my _bed. Under _my _sheets. In _my _arms." That made me drip a bit. Why is he so fucking smart and smooth at the same time? Ugh! I am so conflicted at this moment. I want to believe him(and I really REALLY want him), but I know Matsumoto's not lying. My instincts tell me so. And they are never wrong.

"Hey." I turned to look at him. He gave me the "cum here" finger, and (like an idiot) I lean in. He leans in towards me, steadily getting closer to my parted lips. He stops mere millimeters away from my mouth. He stares into my eyes while his breath brushed my lips gently.

"I wonder," He whispers, "if you would still hate me. Even if I was this close." I became brain dead for a moment. A part of me wanted to say yes but the other part-

He kisses me gently before nibbling softly on my bottom lip. I obeyed him by opening my lips further. He smirks against the kiss in satisfaction at my submissiveness. He kisses me once more before slipping his soft, wet tongue inside my mouth.

I wonder why I get myself into these kind of situations. I blame it on my inability to decide on one thing. His tongue explores the cavern of my mouth; searching and discovering new spots and new tastes. I push against his tongue before swirling around the muscle then dragged him closer, deeper.

It's another good old fashion fight.

He's all I can taste, all I can feel. We take a break to catch our breath. I was blinded by lust and familiarity and at this moment I didn't really care what would happen if we got caught. I looked around for any administrators before getting up from my chair and making his lap my new seat.

My hands slid underneath his shirt to feel his chest (and most of all his rock hard abs!). His hands slides underneath my shirt to feel my stomach before slipping over to my back. He felt all along the curve of my back before dipping one hand underneath my bra strap.

He then kissed me again deeply. Much, much deeper. I remove my hands from underneath his shirt to circle my arms around his neck. I bit his bottom gently before kissing him to apologize. He breaks our kiss gently to pull on my bottom lip before sucking on his favorite spot on my neck. I let out small moans of pleasure. They weren't audible….at least to me.

It was then I felt him starting to unhook my bra. We were kissing still when he moved onto the second row and by the time I broke the kiss my bra was completely unhooked.

"What the fuck? There is no way this is happening right here." He chuckles and smirks before kissing me again to distract me. I pull away again.

"Fix it. Fix it now!"

"Alright, alright." He goes back to kissing me on my neck while hooking my bra back up. After he's finish he suddenly picks me up and carries me over to the farthest corner of the study hall. He held me against the wall; his hands gripping my thighs. I could see we were way in the back. The bookshelves basically covered us. Then I heard my belt unbuckle and I looked down to see him undoing my pants. What the hell? Oh no. Oh no. Oh no!

"What the hell are you doing?" This was wrong in so many ways, but I wasn't trying to stop it. I wasn't going to. It's been far too long. I've buried my hate for him deep down inside me, just for this moment.

"It's been a while since I played with you." Oh he's definitely going to do it. Even he knows it's been too long. The shorts come off along with the underwear. He slides his index finger slowly against me, from top to bottom. It was like he was tracing me; memorizing the entire outline. I shiver in anticipation.

"We can't. We shouldn't. We're at-" His finger slides in past my walls officially quieting me. His finger is all the way in and he rotates inside me; caressing me from the outside before rubbing his thumb over my clit. Another finger slides in then he starts to move in and out.

In and out. In…and….out.

"Ah! Nnggh…right….there!" He moves faster and strokes my spot a few times before finally nailing it on point. That spot has me seeing stars. He kisses me to silence my moan filled voice. It's a pretty sloppy kiss. No lie. He's pounding into me at this point and I love every second of this! His fingers slide in so easily. Probably because their coated. Hahaha!

He leans in towards my ear.

"I can do you better. Whenever you want, wherever you want, and….however you want." He comes out to rub me furiously while he lets out a growl. I can tell I'm dripping a waterfall right now.

"Ah! Ah….ah uh….uh! Oh….my…god! Mmmmm." He goes back in slowly before quickening his pace tenfold.

"I can go soo much deeper than this. Twenty-four seven. All day everyday." I just had an image and right now that's not looking so bad at all.

Aaaaaahhh! I am so close! So fucking close! Almost there. Almost-

I clench around his fingers tightly as I came with a silent cry. He kisses me passionately; fingers still moving in and out. He gradually slows his pace before pulling out completely. I'm out of breath at this point and I can tell that my face is as red as an apple. My cheeks are burning.

He takes his slick, wet fingers into his mouth and sucks them dry making me shake once more. It's crazy how easy I get turned on. Or maybe it's just because of him. He pulls my shorts back up, and buckles my belt while I'm still in a pleasurable daze. He brings me down to the ground which brings me back to Earth.

"I still want a second chance. Even if you say no this time I'll never give up." He gently kisses my parted lips before moving his hands to rest on my hips. Wow…what to say to that question? It's back in full force. My love for him. I will never deny this feeling. I have missed him. More than I let on. But to be double-crossed by someone I've come to love with all my soul. For one of _**our**_ friends to come to me personally and tell me the whole situation….I just can't do it. The plan? I'm not so sure of. I really want to think on this before saying yes (which I know I will).

"…I….I might think about it." His smirk almost made we want to smile, but he's not going to have the upper hand here. "Might! I'm not making any promises."

"Good enough for me." Another kiss, but we were interrupted by the bell ringing. We both looked up before looking at each other. I take my arms from around his neck to straighten out my outfit. I tousled my hair before taking a deep breath; grabbing his hand while I walk past him.

Sometimes it's hard to say no to exes. They already know you. Inside and out. They know what makes you tick and what makes you smile. They can tear you down to the fucking dirt and build you back up towards the sky. The thing is….

Is that we broke up for a reason.

I'm not going to let the subject drop, but for right now I'm not going to mention anything about it either. I plan to fully enjoy the warmth he brings me from his hand to mines.

* * *

*"Shoron"-Introduction

*"I flip my lighter backwards"- When smoking out of bong the best way to avoid burning your fingers with the lighter is to flip it backwards so the flint of the lighter is facing your thumb. This ensures that once you ignite the flame your thumb or any other fingers hovering over it won't get burnt.

*" Like "I keel you*" special attention"-Hahaha Jeff Dunham and Achmed the Dead Terrorist. Haven't seen it? Go to youtube.

*"When he touched me I became chilled. When he kissed me I became pretty high. When he rubbed me down there I was baked. And when those slender fingers slipped gently and slowly into me I was completely toasted!"-Different levels of high. It's kinda hard to explain if you don't smoke, but basically being chilled is not exactly the same as being high. Usually you can function as if you were sober, but you can still feel the small high at the back of your head. Being baked is when you're beyond high. Usually that's when you become a couch potato haha. Toasted is the highest of all highs. Need I say more?

*"...my relations to a minimum or on the DL"-Simple. DL=Down low or secretly.


End file.
